Hi there stranger :)
Lewlewlew, I got some apples. Lewlewlew, you got some too.
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Jessie. 17. England. My blog doesn't have a theme. I reblog things I find funny and things from my fandom. I like lions; trees are pretty; I have a birthmark on my hip; and sometimes I go through phases where I love humous.
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start of sentence: omg
end of sentence: omfg
9 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 56,092 notes

holynipples:

holynipples:

my throat is kinda irritated let me google it and see what’s up

i have a brain tumor

21 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 143,054 notes
moltres:

i feel like these are definitely the 4 stages of masturbation

moltres:

i feel like these are definitely the 4 stages of masturbation

57 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 11,654 notes
ideulistic:

awwww i feel you :((

ideulistic:

awwww i feel you :((

57 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 7,861 notes

Tumblr Code.

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “i have a huge anal gap”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

image

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: i love drinking cum.

image

58 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 489,033 notes
niknak79:

The truth ducks have been hiding

niknak79:

The truth ducks have been hiding

58 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 3,568 notes
Person: What do you want for your birthday?
Me: *Forgets everything I have ever wanted*
59 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 96,319 notes

thorkitastic:

thorgasmed:

me

how fangirl’s kneel for Loki 

59 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 17,781 notes
59 minutes ago on May 21st | J | 284,213 notes
Tagged as: #adorable 
bakerstreetsdoctor:

otpswillruinyourlife:

cant-catch-this-snitch:

castiels-hunter:

caffine-addict:

themeeg:

tin-pan-ali:

taking-the-tardis-to-asgard:

mymahoganymyrules:

maslab:

jykinturah:

nomiros:

takeshitakenji:

“Someone should write a book where the main character slowly falls in love with the reader.”

Last line of the book : “Please, don’t close the book, I don’t want to die”

oh my god

I’d just like, keep the book open and tape it to a wall.

I’m almost afraid to want it.

John Green, we’re waiting.

“So I guess this is it, isn’t it? There are no more chapters, right? You said we were getting close and that was a while ago.”
I stared up into the sky, it was the same old sky there had always been, except for some rainclouds that hadn’t been there a few minutes ago. It wasn’t raining, but they were still floating up there, grey and dismal.
You begin to ask me something.“Don’t ask me how I know, I just do. Things just feel really final right now, like the downward slope is starting to level out. Eventually… We’ll hit the back cover, right?”
I sat down on a bench- had that been there a few minutes ago? It was hard to tell.
“Did you say yes? I think I heard you. Your voice keeps getting harder to hear.”
Thunder rumbled, but… It wasn’t like the thunder I’m used to. It sounded like you, and it sounded sad. From one of the clouds, a single drop of rain fell on the grainy wood of the bench.
“… You’re crying, aren’t you? I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I wish I could change this. I wish I could reach where you are.”
Thunder rolled again, and behind it was a voice. Your voice.
“Me? I’ll be fine, I think. I don’t know if this has ever happened before. I don’t really know what happens when you… close the book.”
You ask me if I’m afraid.
And oddly, I’m not.
“No, actually. Because… Whatever happens to me when you close the cover… You can always open the book up again, right?” and that’s when the answer hits me, the realization jolting me to stand again. “That’s it, isn’t it? You can open it back up. The words won’t change, but I’ll still be here. You can meet me all over again, and I can meet you, and everything we have will come back.”
It’s raining now, and the clouds have merged together, and in them, for the first time… I see you. 
You are the most beautiful person I have ever seen in my entire life.
You’re crying, but it’s quiet, and maybe that was the sound of your tears hitting paper.
I realize that we don’t have a lot of time.
“Listen- before it’s all over- I want you to know that everything, all of this… Even being over, it was worth it. It was worth it to meet you, to get to know you. Even if when you close that cover and I disappear- it was all worth it. I love you.”
You love me too, I know it, I can feel it, just like for a moment I can feel what it would be like to hold your hand.
There is a very long pause, and I realize you’re prolonging what has to happen.
“You can do it.”
For the first time, you have to be the hero. You have to close the book so we can keep going. And I believe in you.
The sky gets darker, slowly, but then it gets light again, and your face is still up in those clouds. You open your mouth and for the first time I HEAR you, not just feel what you’re saying or understand you in my own head, your voice comes through the pages in your world and into the reality of mine, and it reverberates and I can hear every little nuance, down to the hitch from you crying.
“I’ll never forget you,” you say. “I’ll come back soon.”
The end.

SOMEONE DID AND NOW IM EMOTIONAL

Plot Twist: 
“I love you.” She whispered softly closing the book. Her fantasy must end and he must die with it no matter how great their love. Tears fell from her eyes, landing upon the hard worn cover of her most beloved book. The book in which lied the love of her life. The book that loved her back. She ached to open it again but she could not continue like this. She must move on and live a life not in her precious book. Sobs racked her body as she walked to the self, hesitantly sliding her beloved book into the shelf. It was only for a time, she told herself. That she would come back again and read the story of her love again and that she may fall in love again. Whipping her eyes she turned toward the door, but froze in her tracks. A man stood there, concern lining his every feature. She knew that face. It was exactly as she had pictured it, from every line of his jaw to the exact color of his eyes. This can’t be possible.
“Why are you crying?”  Oh, his voice. That was his voice. It was as soothing as she had imagined. Her knees grew week and her mind went numb. She struggled for words as he approached her slowly, he knelt before her and touched her cheek, worry etched in his gentle movement. “What’s wrong? Has something happened?”
She could only choke out, “You’re real?”

I’M SCREAMING

FUCK IT GOT BETTER

MUCH MUCH BETTER 

SCREAMING FROM THIS PERFECTION

bakerstreetsdoctor:

otpswillruinyourlife:

cant-catch-this-snitch:

castiels-hunter:

caffine-addict:

themeeg:

tin-pan-ali:

taking-the-tardis-to-asgard:

mymahoganymyrules:

maslab:

jykinturah:

nomiros:

takeshitakenji:

“Someone should write a book where the main character slowly falls in love with the reader.”

Last line of the book : “Please, don’t close the book, I don’t want to die”

oh my god

I’d just like, keep the book open and tape it to a wall.

I’m almost afraid to want it.

John Green, we’re waiting.

“So I guess this is it, isn’t it? There are no more chapters, right? You said we were getting close and that was a while ago.”

I stared up into the sky, it was the same old sky there had always been, except for some rainclouds that hadn’t been there a few minutes ago. It wasn’t raining, but they were still floating up there, grey and dismal.

You begin to ask me something.

“Don’t ask me how I know, I just do. Things just feel really final right now, like the downward slope is starting to level out. Eventually… We’ll hit the back cover, right?”

I sat down on a bench- had that been there a few minutes ago? It was hard to tell.

“Did you say yes? I think I heard you. Your voice keeps getting harder to hear.”

Thunder rumbled, but… It wasn’t like the thunder I’m used to. It sounded like you, and it sounded sad. From one of the clouds, a single drop of rain fell on the grainy wood of the bench.

“… You’re crying, aren’t you? I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I wish I could change this. I wish I could reach where you are.”

Thunder rolled again, and behind it was a voice. Your voice.

“Me? I’ll be fine, I think. I don’t know if this has ever happened before. I don’t really know what happens when you… close the book.”

You ask me if I’m afraid.

And oddly, I’m not.

“No, actually. Because… Whatever happens to me when you close the cover… You can always open the book up again, right?” and that’s when the answer hits me, the realization jolting me to stand again. “That’s it, isn’t it? You can open it back up. The words won’t change, but I’ll still be here. You can meet me all over again, and I can meet you, and everything we have will come back.”

It’s raining now, and the clouds have merged together, and in them, for the first time… I see you. 

You are the most beautiful person I have ever seen in my entire life.

You’re crying, but it’s quiet, and maybe that was the sound of your tears hitting paper.

I realize that we don’t have a lot of time.

“Listen- before it’s all over- I want you to know that everything, all of this… Even being over, it was worth it. It was worth it to meet you, to get to know you. Even if when you close that cover and I disappear- it was all worth it. I love you.”

You love me too, I know it, I can feel it, just like for a moment I can feel what it would be like to hold your hand.

There is a very long pause, and I realize you’re prolonging what has to happen.

“You can do it.”

For the first time, you have to be the hero. You have to close the book so we can keep going. And I believe in you.

The sky gets darker, slowly, but then it gets light again, and your face is still up in those clouds. You open your mouth and for the first time I HEAR you, not just feel what you’re saying or understand you in my own head, your voice comes through the pages in your world and into the reality of mine, and it reverberates and I can hear every little nuance, down to the hitch from you crying.

“I’ll never forget you,” you say. “I’ll come back soon.”

The end.

SOMEONE DID AND NOW IM EMOTIONAL

Plot Twist: 

“I love you.” She whispered softly closing the book. Her fantasy must end and he must die with it no matter how great their love. Tears fell from her eyes, landing upon the hard worn cover of her most beloved book. The book in which lied the love of her life. The book that loved her back. She ached to open it again but she could not continue like this. She must move on and live a life not in her precious book. Sobs racked her body as she walked to the self, hesitantly sliding her beloved book into the shelf. It was only for a time, she told herself. That she would come back again and read the story of her love again and that she may fall in love again. Whipping her eyes she turned toward the door, but froze in her tracks. A man stood there, concern lining his every feature. She knew that face. It was exactly as she had pictured it, from every line of his jaw to the exact color of his eyes. This can’t be possible.

“Why are you crying?”  Oh, his voice. That was his voice. It was as soothing as she had imagined. Her knees grew week and her mind went numb. She struggled for words as he approached her slowly, he knelt before her and touched her cheek, worry etched in his gentle movement. “What’s wrong? Has something happened?”

She could only choke out, “You’re real?”

I’M SCREAMING

FUCK IT GOT BETTER

MUCH MUCH BETTER 

SCREAMING FROM THIS PERFECTION

1 hour ago on May 21st | J | 277,519 notes
1 hour ago on May 21st | J | 7,950 notes
Tagged as: #adorable 

monilip:

karkats-left-eyeball:

whyaremyballssomadatmybutt:

egberts:

tumblr is giving me the option of following myself

image

do it

rip open a hole in spacetime

image

1 hour ago on May 21st | J | 21,371 notes
1 hour ago on May 21st | J | 55,857 notes
1 hour ago on May 21st | J | 6,000 notes
2 hours ago on May 21st | J | 6,470 notes